The Vivalogue

Well, no matter how much I keep on writing on my blog, I won't cease to be a clown, however occasionally, in technical vivas in this semester at least. When it comes to technical vivas, sometimes I do some of the most hilarious gaffes ever possible. One such incident took place today in my thermal Viva that will ever remain etched in my life.
2:30 PM, Mr. Lanjewar stood in front of the exam controller room of Mechanical Dept., infuriating at a couple of boys who had arrived there on time, by mistake. We had been asked to assemble in Mech dept by 2:30 PM, but we presumed that the external will arrive late as they do always, so we delayed. I walked near and smelled the situation. Actually the external was so EXCITED to conduct the viva that SHE arrived 20 minutes earlier.
We called up our friends, who arrived after a further delay of 10-15 mins. Finally the Viva started and Binty-group was summoned. We were next, so we were prepared for the call.
The door opened, Binty came out. This is a really disappointing part, even after not being the first group to be slaughtered; you never know what is being asked inside. Moreover the external is always beaming with energy for the early ones so that's yet another problem that we have to deal with.
We squeezed inside the room; I heard some noise above my head. I turned my ead to the roof and I nearly fainted. I saw two men hanging down the loft, with mallets and hammers. 'Am I hallucinating??' I asked myself. Then I saw my friends staring at the roof as well, and I felt comforted. The two spidermen seemed to be mending the walls, but had they continued to hear our replies, they'd have probably fainted and landed on our heads.
We seated ourselves, however not comfortably in the congested place full with stuffs, and the interrogation began. Usual questions, funny answers and best of all, Hitendra Kumar nagesia... His thrilling VIVA adventures deserve a separate blog post, so I am sparing the details. But yeah!! I need to mention that he was literally in trance, don't know why... or maybe I do... He is a full-pack entertainment for the external and us both, in every Viva :D
The Vivasorous, that's what we call an external, an innocuous lady this time, seemed apprehensive about asking us questions. Still she did, after all she is being paid for it. Capitalism at its worst... we drench ourselves in sweat writing and studying lab record and what's the reward?? Nothing. While the external get's paid for asking stupid questions, no matter if they know the answer or not!!! At least she can offer us her Samosa-Patties-etc !!! We won't feel bad if she gives us 7 ptr after that... But not less than that...
Very soon she attacked me and asked "How do we classify boilers?". I was stunned for I couldn't recall, but the very next moment I did. I replied in a choked voice, "I said: well according to pressure and position and ummm.. THEY ARE CLASSIFIED... she gave me a weird look... I realised what I had said. And she realised that I am in no mood of sharing any "classified" informations...
Overall, the Viva was cool, and she seemed quite a friendly creature. At least not like the Legendary H.B. Khurasia, better known to mechies as Universal Viva Machine. During our sophomore years, every night, many mechies woke up in the middle of their sleeps shouting "UVM aa gaya" and went back to sleep when we realised that it was just a nightmare... He was our bogeyman!! But today we can say that we met the tooth-fairy...(No she was not pretty, if you have interpreted that way)

please kill 'em

If God gives me one wish that he can grant me, I'll ask for death of all Indian authors... Stupid books, zero logic, improper design(yes I just solved a couple of Gear design questions and obtained better solutions)... and plenty of reverse engineering( modifying the solution in order to arrive to an answer which you already know)... Bhangaar Bhandari he is the most preferred writer in Machine design.. But so awefull that students lose interest in machine design!!!

what should be the theme??

I am still facing difficulty in deciding upon the topic I should write a book on. I am sure it will be a fiction but can't decide on what topic should it be. If I write on relations.. people will have a hearty laugh, because it will be like an Eskimo from antarctica writing about the backwaters of Kerala. The only options I am left with are either writing on friendship or college comedies. But I won't have time till the fall of 2010 to start pondering. However, I am writing this to keep me reminded of this task. I will start with the first chapter as soon as I arrive upon the decision of which topic should I write on... suggestions invited